Aside from being a pretty cool trainer, RubySlippers is her own brand of funny which makes training with her quite a riot! I certainly don’t do her justice here because it’s way funnier when she says a lot of this stuff and of course I try to keep this blog PG so some editing is involved 😉
Me: *Awkwardly lifting a barbell*
RubySlippers: Um, yeah hands go the other way hun, but don’t pay any attention to me, you can keep ignoring me if you want, I’m just your trainer no big deal!
AB wheel rollouts
RubySlippers: *Rolls out Jackie Chan style on ab wheel then says* So you’re supposed to go this low *then rolls back up half way and says* but you’ll probably only get to about here, that’s ok.
Me: Are you just like showing off, or do you really want me to do these
Rubyslippers: Both! I’m pro like that!
Chatty Cathys on the workout mat
Me: You seem distracted
RubySlippers: They’ve been talking all this time on the same spot since we started like an hour ago!
Me: Oh, isn’t that what the workout mat is for?
RubySlippers: I don’t know, but I feel like I should bring them coffee or something
Me: Tanning isn’t that great for the skin you know that right?
RubySlippers: Hey, not everyone is born with your complexion!
Me: What do you mean? You’ve got a nice color
RubySlippers: That’s because I tan! It takes work to look this good *flexes*…hahaha!
Me: But I love cupcakes!
RubySlippers: It all depends on what you want
Me: What do you mean?
Rubyslippers: If you want to look like a cupcake then eat a cupcake!
RubySlippers: So what are you doing after?
Me: I don’t know yet, maybe…
RubySlippers: *interrupts me* Girl, run, row or do bike sprints just don’t let me catch you on an elliptical!!!
Me: *Getting ready*
RubySlippers: Please tell me you remember how to do burpees…JK, who forgets those *Laughs* Ok, go!
Me: *Trying to get the burpees done, but keep having to pull up my workout pants as they keep falling*
RubySlippers: What’s wrong? Oh, are your pants falling down because they’re too big now??? Poor baybeee, yeah sorry about that! Keep going you can thank me later!
Me: Hopefully I’ll graduate to real push-ups
RubySlippers: Fo Sho girl if you do what I say you will!
Me: How do you do your push-ups?
RubySlippers: Have you seen The Zohan push-ups?
Me: Yeah, why?
RubySlippers: So now you know how I do push-ups
Picking a Trainer
RubySlippers: Why are you smiling? Are you ok?
Me: Yeah, I was just thinking…
RubySlippers: Wow, congratulations!
Me: *sprinkled with sarcasm* Ha, ha, funny! Do you know why I picked you?
RubySlippers: Because I’m pretty!
RubySlippers: Are you saying I’m not pretty? *Looks in the mirror* Hey so you weren’t going to tell me I need to fix my hair?
Me: I picked you because you’re fit and I thought you were a mean trainer that would Jillian Michaels me into shape! Now, when I see you smile & go all mushy about your pup I feel duped!
RubySlippers: Girl, I’m way prettier than her! *laughs* But yeah I will jump on your back if I have to!
RubySlippers: I missed a spot!
Me: Of what?
RubySlippers: Of shaving on my leg!
RubySlippers: So don’t look at it!
Me: I don’t see it
RubySlippers: What did I say??? Don’t look!
Me: It’s kinda hard when I’m doing crunches this close to you and you’re wearing tiny shorts, but if it bugs you maybe laser it off or put some pants on
RubySlippers: Nah, it would peel my tan! *Mumbles something but I only hear hot and pants*
Me: I’m sorry did you say it’s too hot or you’re too hot for pants?