21 Day Challenge: Day 9

In one of my recent posts I mentioned the power of language and self-talk.  I’ve been paying closer attention to what I say to myself in these last few days.  One thing I have noticed is that when it comes to my work which I love, I always tell myself I “MUST” or I “WILL” do this or that when I’m going through my tasks for the day.  I don’t use “maybe” or “might” but when it comes to working out or making other choices in my life I do use “maybe”, “might”, “tomorrow” and other words that make it easy to create excuses.

This evening I took and accidental nap.  I changed into my workout clothes to go for a walk, and instead of heading out right away I thought I would lie down for a moment, which I did, except that that moment turned into a two hour nap.  By the time I woke up I really didn’t feel like working out.  I honestly just felt like changing into my pjs and calling it a day.  But, then I remembered I would have to blog about it and decided I had to get it done.

So, I jumped out of bed and threw my running shoes on.  I made a choice and made getting some steps in a MUST rather than a MAYBE or a TOMORROW.  The funny thing about saying tomorrow is that that’s what I’ve been telling myself for months and it just never happened.  It’s too bad it have taken these rude 4:30 am wake-ups to get some clarity back.  The good news is that it’s getting better.

At then end of the day, it really is about choice.  There are some things in our lives we cannot control, but for those things we can control, it’s about being strong enough to make the right choice for ourselves.   Sometimes we’re lucky and have a RubbySlippers in our lives to push us beyond our comfort zone, and other times we have to be our own RubbySlippers and believe that we’ve got this!

So for those of you who are following along and maybe even doing this challenge with me, remember that your 4:30 AM may be a little different.  Maybe you work nights or evenings, maybe you have kids or loved ones you take care of, maybe there’s school and life going one.  But you always have the power to chose getting up 15 minutes before your usual wake-up time and progressively turn it into an hour of you time.  What you do with this time is up to you, but it will certainly get rid of the “I don’t have time excuse” and allow you to reclaim some ME-Time.

Well, that’s all for this Cookiefiend today.  Signing off at 11,028 steps for the day.  Good night world!

 

21 Day Challenge: Day 6

This morning I woke up and asked myself why am I doing this?  What is the purpose of this, and what do I expect to accomplish?  That early in the morning my mind really didn’t have a crystal clear answer, and my body was saying just go back to sleep it’s Saturday.  Still, as tempting as that was, there was a stronger uncomfortable feeling saying quitting would feel worst than just getting up.

Over the years I’ve started many things and never really seen them through.  There seems to be something about commitment that scares me.  Maybe that’s why I like trying things but not really sticking to them once the experience is done.  So far it’s made for an interesting and rather fun lifestyle.  I’ve traveled, I’ve tried bubble soccer, snowboarding, skiing, archery, fencing, roller coasters, parasailing and so on.  I’ve live on a mountain and off the grid and it’s really all been about seeing if I could do it.  But once it was done and checked off my list, then it was just one more level completed and on to the next new adventure in the game of life.

Still, all of these things were fun, and that’s why I don’t have any regrets about trying them out and getting them done.  But this business of getting up so early is not fun.  It’s hard, and I wonder if it’s because that’s what I keep telling myself.  I keep using this language over and over and maybe that’s all my mind is hearing.  It keeps hearing that I don’t know if I’ll make it, that it’s hard, that it’s crazy and so forth.  Not the most positive self talk for someone who is looking for a transformational outcome.

When I think of how I talk to my friends, and how I try to be encouraging and supportive, I wonder when my words to myself stopped being encouraging and supportive and why they’ve become so self-limiting.  The change in my self-talk language, and how much more I use the words “I’m exhausted”, “I can’t”, “it’s too hard”, just crept up on me.  It’s funny that it took a sleep deprived brain to realize that I need to change more than just my bedtime.

I knew from the start that this would be a challenge.  At first I thought I could complete it and just check it off my list.  But now I realize it’s more than just a challenge, it’s a journey I have to see through.  The purpose of this challenge is no longer just to have more time for a workout, but also to take control back, to change my words and maybe even my perception.

Let’s see how this all unfolds in the next few days, and what other insight skipping the 4:30AM snooze brings.

Good night world, I’ll see you on Day 7!

21 Day Challenge: Day 5

As tired as I was this morning I surprised myself by getting up at 4:30 AM, Yay Day 5!  I had a mini workout and then checked my email.  Forwarded some updates for work and even had time to check Swagbucks.

I’ve had intentions to quit a few times from Swagbucks, but then it seems that every time I think of just leaving it behind I get a reminder email of how close I am to my next reward, and I keep coming back.  I’m not a serious Swagbucks collector because I feel like it can be time-consuming when you don’t qualify for most surveys.  But I’ve gotten a few amazon gift cards and movie ones so it’s not bad just for answering daily polls and checking out a few offers, points eventually add up for free stuff 🙂

So I’m hoping that as slow as my progress is with these mini workouts, I’ll eventually start seeing results just like I do in Swagbucks.  One can hope right?

Also, the weekend is here and although I like sleeping in as much as the next person, Day 6 and Day 7 are waiting for me.  Still, even if I do wake up super early there is still the beauty of being able to take a nap and that makes me happy.

Today’s micro workout:

  • 12 Spiderman crawls
  • 12 push-ups
  • 12 sit-ups
  • 12 squats
  • 12 lunges
  • A short walk downtown

I watched a video today from a little guy I am fortunate to know.  He happens to have a spinal cord injury but is as cool as can be.  He really doesn’t let anything get in his way.  He skis, fences, plays tennis, plays drums, sings and performs.  Basically he does it all!  Most importantly he says life is too short and we should get out there and do things.  And he’s right.  Life is meant to be lived.  There really is no reason why we can’t be active.  Even if it means hunting Pokémon.  So let’s get do this!

That’s all from this Cookiefiend today.  Signing off, until Day 6!

21 Day Challenge : Day 3

Ok, so it’s day 3 and I’m exhausted.  It’s not even 10 PM and I am fighting to keep my eyes open.  I also may have fallen asleep while watching The Lego Movie, and that never happens!  Is this my body adjusting to the shock or going into shock?  I am not going to lie, the thought of 18 more days of this is daunting, but I’ve already invested 3 days and I can’t stop now, can I?

After all, nothing changes if nothing change.  And I need change in my life right now.  I also need a few new pants and a new pair of shoes, but shopping is not something I enjoy.  I dislike trying stuff on and not being sure whether or not I should by it.  Also, finding a sales rep honest enough to tell it like it is isn’t always easy these days, because everyone is so sensitive.  Still when I look at something and think it’s a NO for me, and a sales person starts saying how amazing it looks, I usually lose interest.

I remember once going into a store and trying a few things on.  They had the mirror outside the small dressing room and my sales person kept saying everything I tried on was amazing.  She was very nice and had said the same thing to her previous customer who made a large purchase.  As I came out wearing the last outfit and ready to leave empty handed again, he co-worker stopped by and had a nice tailored pant suit in one hand and three blouses in the other and he said he had noticed I wasn’t convinced by everything I had tried on so far, but thought this might work.

I remember coming out and liking the suit but not the blouse and before I could say anything he said, no, and came back with a different color blouse.  I remember thinking that day of how great it would be to have a personal shopper or designer.  Shopping was so much easier that way.  I made a large purchase that day, and even wore that suit to an interview.  I’ve been back to that store a few times, but that sale rep has moved to the big city, and I’m sure is helping more people like me look like responsible adults.

Still, I’ve been putting this off for a while because I dread it and don’t look forward to finding out what my new comfortable pant size is 😦  But I have two choices.  One, start working out or two keep buying bigger pants.  So, workout it is.

Today’s mini workout:

  • 10 push-ups (from the knees)
  • 10 sit-ups
  • 10 squats
  • 10 stationary lunges (5 each side, I still have to be able to walk tomorrow)
  • 10 Spiderman crawls (my attempt at them, who knew that was so hard)

Well, so far Day 3 includes a mini-workout which means it’s better than yesterday.  I’ll take it as an improvement.

Whatever you are doing in your life, do one thing no matter how small to make today better than yesterday.

That’s all from this Cookiefiend today.  Signing off at 22:05h.  Good night world, I’ll see you on day 4!

21 Day Challenge

If I had to describe my first 4:30 AM day in one word, I think it would have to be “rough”.  It may have something to do with my bedtime last night, so I am going to try to get to bed earlier today.  I’m not going to lie, I’ve been yawning for the last 3 hours and feel so drained.  I wasn’t very productive this morning, I just sat there contemplating why I was trying this and thinking that perhaps it is sheer madness.

Although it did give me time to think about my day, most of my focus was on staying awake.  So today I am going to try going to bed a little earlier to see if it pays off in the morning.  It would be nice to finally have a set workout time again, and perhaps those 3 hours I would gain in theory would allow me to get things I don’t particularly enjoy like working-out, out of the way first thing in the morning and leave time for other fun stuff later in the day.

I have an early party to go to tomorrow, it’s funny the older you get the earlier parties seem to get.  Then again they’ve also gone from plain ol’parties, to Tupperware parties, work parties, Enjo parties en so on.  Still it’s always nice to have a break in the day where you can just relax and enjoy the company of your friends and colleagues outside the workplace.  Also, Tupperware parties have come a long way since I remember attending one with my mom a million years ago.  Now they’re cooking demos, of 4 minute brownies, buffalo chicken dip, guacamole and many other delicious treats, no wonder people go to them.  And of course there is the nostalgia of flipping through the catalog and seeing so many things my parents still have in their kitchen.

Well, that’s all for today. it’s 21:50 h and time for sleep.  Until Day 2!

The Giver

colorappleYears ago, I read The Giver.  It reminded me of 1984, Utopia, and Plato’s Republic, and it made me wonder if the Receiver of memory chose the right path.  Since then, many things have happened in my life.  I’ve traveled, I’ve lived, I’ve loved and I’ve seen how beautiful life can be for some, and how incredibly cruel it can be to others.  Thoughts of the latter still haunt me… I’ve never known hunger, and aside from history books and television I have no memory of war, but I’ve seen the turmoil it leaves behind long after peace treaties are signed.  I’ve lived in a gang-infested country, where people live in constant fear, and hunger drives people to things we can’t even fathom.  I don’t think I’ll ever understand why there is such disparity, and part of me almost wishes we could all live in “sameness” and fairytale happiness. 

Still, one look at the news and I can tell that our global village is still light years away from peace and the opportunity for everyone to have all the freedoms and opportunities we have and sometimes take for granted.  Although the movie is but a shadow of the book, it still managed to shed some perspective on my first world problems.  Which, truth be told, seem trivial in comparison to what people around the world endure.  So as you go through your day remind yourself that you have freedom of choice, and make sure your choices count for something…Choose to be happy, choose to be kind, choose to do good and choose to get better 🙂   

problems in a pile

 

 

 

Echos through the years

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Echos through the years

Birthdays…so bittersweet. I had such a great day yesterday, that I almost forgot to think of you…It dawned on me that I have lived over three decades now and still I know so little. But for all my shortcomings, I have and continue to know love and kindness.

You may no longer be here, but what I learned from you will continue to echo through the years, even long after I am gone…

To you, whom I once knew, who I loved, admired, with whom I laughed, cried, climbed walls, mountains, held hands, colored outside the lines, cheated at UNO, stared up at the stars, jumped off from chairs, sat in silence and learned lessons that no textbook will ever teach me, I say thank you.

Please forgive me for wasting the time and potential you saw in me. Forgive me for wallowing in self pity for so long. Forgive me for not embracing the life you fought so hard to keep. Forgive me for not honoring the memory that is you…

As I type away, the people who love me most in this world wait to celebrate the fact that I am here. Such a simple concept. I often find myself wondering what it is that makes people love us in spite of all our flaws. It’s kind of magic and rare really. Love is the real unicorn in the room. It’s that thing that keeps us together. A smile, a hug, a text, a call, a note, a hello for no reason at all…all little testaments of love ❤

So simple, yet so ephemeral. For all my absentmindedness know that thanks to you there is never absent-hearted-ness here. So in a few minutes when I walk up those stairs and get ready to celebrate one more year of being just me…I will also be celebrating you.

You, all the wonderful people I was privileged to know before your journeys on this world were cut short too soon. You my friends and loved ones who don’t get to Skype me at midnight to wish me a happy birthday anymore. You whose number I can still recite off by heart, but who now are in a better place, yet still make me smile when I hear that stupid song you use to sing so horribly. You who no longer have birthdays, and who are missed by so many…there’s a few of you up there now, so do me another little favor will you? Give my Guardian Angel a hand on keeping me out of trouble, it seems I am a handful at time 😉

I still suspect he purposely blinked to miss that moment before I broke my leg. Longest 5 weeks of my life!

But I digress…and apologize to those of you who read my blog and were expecting a workout related post. I did have a great pre-bday workout on Saturday and will likely post it at some point, but not today. I even climbed a wall with AG and walked in thigh deep snow and across some tracks on our way to get a very delicious meal…this winter workout though I might not elaborate on because my writing skills would not do justice to such and epic adventure #livingontheedge 😉

It’s getting late, birthday feast and cake await. Thank you for reading. Thank you for being you. Never forget that you have the power of being kind to someone. Let love and kindness be your legacy in this world, let it too echo through the years.

To my living friends, thank you for sticking around this long, I luv u guys!!!! To the friends I have yet to meet, I can’t wait to beat you at UNO, Jenga, Monopoly and who knows maybe even at a burpee challenge…uh I mean can’t wait to meet you, darn auto-correct LOL! 😉

P.S. Let’s keep moving, let’s keep breathing, but most importantly let’s start LIVING!